A few thoughts, emotions and feelings to track the metamorphosis of my body, mind & spirit during this journey of my life...
Tuesday, October 16, 2012
Sunday, October 14, 2012
Agar Tum Mil Jao... (Song Dedication)
I had never seen the actual movie version of this amazing Soulmate song untill yesterday, and was extremely disappointed to see how they had perverted the beauty and the depth in it.... a total heart break...
So here is the song For you My Love with a beautiful presentation that I found on Youtube...
Wednesday, October 10, 2012
His prayer is mine too...
THOUGH I WAS UNABLE TO BE AS GOOD A HUMAN BEING THAT HE WAS, BECAUSE OF ALL THE HORRORS OF MY PAST HAPPENING ALL OVER AGAIN... AND GETTING HIT IN ALL THE SAME PLACES I WAS ALREADY HURT AND IN PAIN.
YET ALL I HAVE IS A PRAYER FOR YOUR HAPPINESS AND WELL BEING: " MAY ALL YOUR SORROWS BE MINE AND ALL MY HAPPINESS BE YOURS, WHERE EVER YOU ARE AND WITH WHOEVER YOU ARE...
I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU...
Tuesday, October 9, 2012
But As Long As I Live....
Till the time God Decides to grant me my Death Wish...
I WILL:
I WILL:
- Dedicate the rest of my Life In Penance for all the Sins I have committed.
- Dedicate the rest of my Life To Loving You, no matter where I am.
- Dedicate the rest of my life To prove to you The Real Meaning of True Love and that it Exists.
- Prove that True Love is the only thing that One Needs to Live & Be Happy.
- Prove that True Love Can Teach One Anything.
Monday, October 8, 2012
Death Cometh To Me!!!
Nothing in my life, I REALLY MEAN NOTHING!!! BUT GOD & YOU!!! CAN EVER BREAK AND DESTROY ME TO THE CORE...
AND ONLY YOU CAN BREAK AND DESTROY ME THE WAY YOU HAVE...
I HAVE STOOD UP AFTER FALLING DOWN EVERY TIME THROUGH Child Hood Abuse, Heart Breaks, Losses, Countless Failures, Financial Crunches, Accidents, Deaths, Etc Etc
BUT THIS TIME I AM DONE...
AND ALL I CAN PRAY IS FOR GOD TO GRANT ME MY DEATH WISH...
AND ONLY YOU CAN BREAK AND DESTROY ME THE WAY YOU HAVE...
I HAVE STOOD UP AFTER FALLING DOWN EVERY TIME THROUGH Child Hood Abuse, Heart Breaks, Losses, Countless Failures, Financial Crunches, Accidents, Deaths, Etc Etc
BUT THIS TIME I AM DONE...
AND ALL I CAN PRAY IS FOR GOD TO GRANT ME MY DEATH WISH...
I Will Always Wait For You My Love....
I hold my phone close to my heart hoping you would call, but you don't...
Every now and then I hear the phone ring just to realize it wasn't...
But Every time it did ring I thought it was you, only to realize it was someone else...
Every time I received a SMS I think its from you, only to realize that its spam...
Every time I see your posts online, hoping that it would be something dedicated to us and me, unfortunately there is always something to Shock/Hurt/Destroy Me with stuff dedicated to your new life, your hopes for a new man, your high end materialistic fancies or INSULTING OUR RELATIONSHIP...
I Know You Never Did, You Never Can and You Never Will Be Able To Love Me Truly...
The Way I Did, I Do and Always Will Love Your Truly
But Yet I Will Always Love You And Wait For You My Love...
Every now and then I hear the phone ring just to realize it wasn't...
But Every time it did ring I thought it was you, only to realize it was someone else...
Every time I received a SMS I think its from you, only to realize that its spam...
Every time I see your posts online, hoping that it would be something dedicated to us and me, unfortunately there is always something to Shock/Hurt/Destroy Me with stuff dedicated to your new life, your hopes for a new man, your high end materialistic fancies or INSULTING OUR RELATIONSHIP...
I Know You Never Did, You Never Can and You Never Will Be Able To Love Me Truly...
The Way I Did, I Do and Always Will Love Your Truly
But Yet I Will Always Love You And Wait For You My Love...
I WILL ALWAYS BE WORRIED ABOUT YOU MY LOVE...
NO MATTER WHERE YOU ARE AND WITH WHO YOU ARE I WILL ALWAYS BE WORRIED ABOUT YOU MY LOVE
I will always be worried about:
God Bless You My Love... Please Be Good, Do Good & Always Stay Safe...
I will always be worried about:
- Your Health and Well Being
- Your Mental and Spiritual Evolution
- Your Way of Life
- Your Addictions and Weakness
- Your Physical, Mental & Spiritual Safety and Security
God Bless You My Love... Please Be Good, Do Good & Always Stay Safe...
Everything That I Am, I Am Because Of My LOVE FOR YOU....
I was very very young when I first felt that I had a Soulmate. In fact it was from that very moment that my life changed forever...
Since then Everything in my life was clear. I had only One Goal: To give my best, to make myself
Since then Everything in my life was clear. I had only One Goal: To give my best, to make myself
- A Perfect Man that my Soulmate would be proud of, though I know that she would love me no matter whether I was the president of a Country, bill or just an ordinary guy. I must always be capable of supporting and looking after my Soulmate, even if she couldn't. For That I would Have To
- Be A Good Human Being (The most difficult task in the world) - By being a Good Man, Good Lover & Husband, Good Son, Good Sibling, Good Friend and a Good Social Being.
- I should never ever get attracted to or be carried away by all the evil or materialistic things in the world.
- I will have to destroy everything evil and bad inside of me. I know the evil way of life is the most tempting and attractive but I will find the right way, no matter how difficult a path it is to follow I will keep trying and never give up
- Learn everything that would be necessary to Look After/Help/Protect/Support my Soulmate to not just Exist and Survive, but to also live life peacefully and happily.
So to make my self as Perfect A Man I could be for my Soulmate, I had to develop my Body, Mind and Spirit.
With this Goal firmly fixed in my mind, I started my search for knowledge and the truths of Life, God, Love, Sacrifice, Honesty, Loyalty and everything I could, to help me in my Impossible task to becoming a Good Human Being. It took me years of mistakes, hurt and failures to even learn the little that I have, and am still learning. Not surprisingly it has been more difficult, to imbibe and put to practice all that have learnt.
In Order to help me face this challenge, I started to follow One of the most Perfect Ways of Life known to man: MARTIAL ART (Budo in Japanese). Martial Art helps me connect with my Spirit, Discipline & Focus my Mind and Strengthen my weak Body. It helps me fight the evil/bad things that had gotten inside of me (from the merciless evil world, that was I helplessly and continuously exposed to since my childhood...)
With this Goal firmly fixed in my mind, I started my search for knowledge and the truths of Life, God, Love, Sacrifice, Honesty, Loyalty and everything I could, to help me in my Impossible task to becoming a Good Human Being. It took me years of mistakes, hurt and failures to even learn the little that I have, and am still learning. Not surprisingly it has been more difficult, to imbibe and put to practice all that have learnt.
In Order to help me face this challenge, I started to follow One of the most Perfect Ways of Life known to man: MARTIAL ART (Budo in Japanese). Martial Art helps me connect with my Spirit, Discipline & Focus my Mind and Strengthen my weak Body. It helps me fight the evil/bad things that had gotten inside of me (from the merciless evil world, that was I helplessly and continuously exposed to since my childhood...)
In addition to all the above, I had to try to learn all the practical skills of life as much as my Body could take and which ranged from Cooking, Self Defense, Home Management, Science & Technology, Computers, Business, Basic First Aid & Medicine, Jungle/Calamity Survival, Music, Dancing & Entertainment, Hygiene, Dressing, Etiquette, Interpersonal & Communication Skills, Looking after Pets to Repairing & Maintenance of things etc.
TO BE HONEST: I ALWAYS KNEW THAT I WAS TRYING TO ACHIEVE THE MOST DIFFICULT TASK KNOWN TO MAN AND HAVE TO ADMIT THAT THE JOURNEY HAS BEEN EXTREMELY DIFFICULT, CHALLENGING TO MY BODY, MIND & SPIRIT, HUMBLING AND MANY TIMES SEEMINGLY UNREWARDING, JUST REMEMBERING THAT I AM DOING ALL THIS FOR YOU MY SOULMATE, HAS KEPT ME GOING... AND MAKES ME FEEL PROUD THAT AT LEAST I AM TRYING, WHAT MANY WOULD NEVER...
INTERESTINGLY IN MY CASE THE SAYING "LOVE TEACHES ALL" TURNED OUT TO BE PRETTY TRUE...
TO BE HONEST: I ALWAYS KNEW THAT I WAS TRYING TO ACHIEVE THE MOST DIFFICULT TASK KNOWN TO MAN AND HAVE TO ADMIT THAT THE JOURNEY HAS BEEN EXTREMELY DIFFICULT, CHALLENGING TO MY BODY, MIND & SPIRIT, HUMBLING AND MANY TIMES SEEMINGLY UNREWARDING, JUST REMEMBERING THAT I AM DOING ALL THIS FOR YOU MY SOULMATE, HAS KEPT ME GOING... AND MAKES ME FEEL PROUD THAT AT LEAST I AM TRYING, WHAT MANY WOULD NEVER...
INTERESTINGLY IN MY CASE THE SAYING "LOVE TEACHES ALL" TURNED OUT TO BE PRETTY TRUE...
UNFORTUNATELY EVERYTHING CAME TO CRASH... EVERYTHING I HAD BEEN WORKING HARD TO ACHIEVE, I DESTROYED WITH MY VERY OWN HANDS. JUST BECAUSE OF A FEW UNDESERVING EVIL, SHAMELESS MATERIALISTIC PHYSICAL, MENTAL & SPIRITUAL SLUTS WHO I LET ENTER INTO MY LIFE JUST BECAUSE I MISTOOK THEM TO BE MY SOULMATE. SINCE MY GUARD USED TO BE ALWAYS DOWN, THEY LEFT NO STONE UNTURNED, TO DESTROY ME SPIRITUALLY, MENTALLY AND PHYSICALLY. THE BACK LASH OF ALL THIS DESTROYED THE HUMAN BEING IN ME AND TRIGGERED THE ANIMAL SIDE OF ME AND TURNED INTO A DEMON, I COULD NEVER IMAGINE I COULD EVER BECOME.....
THOUGH I HAVE SUCCESSFULLY TRANSFORMED MYSELF BACK TO WHAT I REALLY AM, I AM STILL IN PAIN BECAUSE OF THE INJURIES INFLICTED ON MY BODY, MIND AND SPIRIT. WHICH WILL HEAL ONLY WHEN YOU MY SOULMATE WILL COME IN TO MY LIFE...
BEING IN LOVE WITH YOU MY SOULMATE IS VERY PAINFUL AND LONELY MOST OF THE TIME, BUT MY HOPE OF BEING WITH YOU WILL NEVER DIE TILL MY LAST BREATH AND SO I WILL CONTINUE MY EFFORT TO ACHIEVE MY GOAL TO BE EVERYTHING FOR YOU MY SOULMATE....
THOUGH I HAVE SUCCESSFULLY TRANSFORMED MYSELF BACK TO WHAT I REALLY AM, I AM STILL IN PAIN BECAUSE OF THE INJURIES INFLICTED ON MY BODY, MIND AND SPIRIT. WHICH WILL HEAL ONLY WHEN YOU MY SOULMATE WILL COME IN TO MY LIFE...
BEING IN LOVE WITH YOU MY SOULMATE IS VERY PAINFUL AND LONELY MOST OF THE TIME, BUT MY HOPE OF BEING WITH YOU WILL NEVER DIE TILL MY LAST BREATH AND SO I WILL CONTINUE MY EFFORT TO ACHIEVE MY GOAL TO BE EVERYTHING FOR YOU MY SOULMATE....
Saturday, October 6, 2012
I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU..... (Song Dedication)
My Love Its all I have to say to you...
I Will Always Love You by Whitney Houston
from The Bodyguard SoundtrackIf I
Should stay
I would only be in your way
So I'll go
But I know
I'll think of you every step of
the way
And I...
Will always
Love you, oohh
Will always
Love you
You
My darling you
Mmm-mm
Bittersweet
Memories
That is all I'm taking with me
So good-bye
Please don't cry
We both know I'm not what you
You need
And I...
Will always love you
I...
Will always love you
You, ooh
I hope
life treats you kind
And I hope
you have all you've dreamed of
And I wish you joy
and happiness
But above all this
I wish you love
And I...
Will always love you
I...
Will always love you
[Repeat]
I, I will always love
You....
You
Darling I love you
I'll always
I'll always
Love
You..
Oooh
Ooohhh
Wednesday, September 26, 2012
We Are Stuck With Each Other [In A Good Way] (Song Dedication)
Shontelle ft. Akon – Stuck with Each Other Song Words
You can think you can get freeYou think you won’t need me
That you’re gonna get you somethin’ better
But you know that we’re in this forever
And you can think you can walk out
Even with your doubts
But you know that we’re in this together
You can try to push me from you
Nothing you do will keep us a part
Cause it’s too late, there’s no escape
Might as well face it, baby we’re stuck with each other
Stuck with each other
Ain’t nothin you can do about it
It’s been too long, it’s been too strong
Cause we belong here
Baby, we’re stuck with each other
Stuck with each other
Stuck in love with each other
(stuck in love with each other)
Yeah
Now I can say that I would not care
If you were not there
Tell myself that I’ll be fine without ya
but I would die if I was not around ya
and I can try to convince you
I don’t need to be with you
But my only thoughts are thoughts about ya
What can I do, love is like glue
There’s no way to
Tear us a part
Cause it’s too late (too late, too late)
There’s no escape, might as well face it
Baby we’re stuck with each other
Stuck with each other (with each other)
Ain’t nothin i can do about it
It’s been too long, it’s been too strong
Yes, we belong here
Baby we’re stuck with each other
Stuck with each other (stuck with each other)
stuck in love with each other
(stuck in love with each other)
Song words are provided by Geniusbeauty.com
There’s nothing i’d rather do
Than to sit with you forever
Can’t think of nothing better
Than to be stuck with you
Cause it’s too late, there’s no escape
Might as well face it
baby we’re stuck with each other
Stuck with each other
Ain’t nothin we can do about it
Oh yeah
Cause it’s too late, there’s no escape
Might as well face it
baby we’re stuck with each other
Stuck with each other
Ain’t nothin I can do about it
It’s been too long, it’s been too strong
Yes, we belong here
baby, we’re stuck with each other
Stuck with each other
Stuck in love with each other
(Stuck in love with each other)
Cause it’s too long, it’s been too strong
Yes we belong here
baby we’re stuck with each other
Stuck with each other
Stuck in love with each other
Cause it’s too long, it’s been too strong
Yes we belong here
baby we’re stuck with each other
Stuck with each other
Stuck in love with each other
Stuck in love with each other
Ain’t nothin gonna stop me and you eh
Cause you know we just stuck like glue eh
Ain’t nothin we can do
We stuck in love with each other
Thursday, August 2, 2012
I TOLD YOU...
I AM SURE YOU REMEMBER THAT:
I told you that your change was superficial...
but you said that it was from your core.
I told you that by leaving me, you will feel free and unrestricted...
but you said that you did not want anything but Me.
I told you that by leaving me you will get your life back...
but you said you had no life without Me.
I told you that it was good for you and that you would feel right about it...
but you said that you would be sad about it.
I told you that the day you got back into your world you would become what you were...
but you said that you understood what was right from wrong and you would you never become like what you were.
I told you that the moment you break free you would go back to doing all that you promised me that you understood was wrong...
and you told me that you would never do those things again because you understood that those things were bad for you.
BUT THE MOST PAINFUL ONE AND THE ONE THAT I MYSELF PRAYED TO NEVER COME TRUE WAS THAT :
I TOLD YOU THAT THE MOMENT YOU GOT BACK TO YOUR WAY OF LIFE YOU WOULD .........
AND YOU SAID THAT YOU WERE NOT A ........
ITS UNFORTUNATE THAT EVERYTHING I SAID TURNED OUT TO BE TRUE AND THAT I WAS RIGHT ALL THE TIME AND YOU WERE NOT EVEN AWARE/HONEST ABOUT WHAT YOU REALLY WOULD DO OR WHAT YOU REALLY ARE...
Like I always say 2+2 = 4 not 6 not 8
WHY MY LOVE DID YOU TURN OUT TO BE SO PREDICTABLE JUST LIKE EVERYONE ELSE???
I told you that your change was superficial...
but you said that it was from your core.
I told you that by leaving me, you will feel free and unrestricted...
but you said that you did not want anything but Me.
I told you that by leaving me you will get your life back...
but you said you had no life without Me.
I told you that it was good for you and that you would feel right about it...
but you said that you would be sad about it.
I told you that the day you got back into your world you would become what you were...
but you said that you understood what was right from wrong and you would you never become like what you were.
I told you that the moment you break free you would go back to doing all that you promised me that you understood was wrong...
and you told me that you would never do those things again because you understood that those things were bad for you.
BUT THE MOST PAINFUL ONE AND THE ONE THAT I MYSELF PRAYED TO NEVER COME TRUE WAS THAT :
I TOLD YOU THAT THE MOMENT YOU GOT BACK TO YOUR WAY OF LIFE YOU WOULD .........
AND YOU SAID THAT YOU WERE NOT A ........
ITS UNFORTUNATE THAT EVERYTHING I SAID TURNED OUT TO BE TRUE AND THAT I WAS RIGHT ALL THE TIME AND YOU WERE NOT EVEN AWARE/HONEST ABOUT WHAT YOU REALLY WOULD DO OR WHAT YOU REALLY ARE...
Like I always say 2+2 = 4 not 6 not 8
WHY MY LOVE DID YOU TURN OUT TO BE SO PREDICTABLE JUST LIKE EVERYONE ELSE???
at
7:08 AM
Labels:
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,
Bad
,
Change
,
Core
,
Feel
,
Free
,
Honest
,
I Told You
,
Never Do
,
No Life
,
Predicatable
,
Right
,
Superficial
,
Understand
,
Want
,
Wrong


Tuesday, July 31, 2012
The Wrong Reasons For Which You Have Left Me...
"The Very Reasons For Which You Have Left Me,
Had Always Been, Are and Will Always Be The Very Reasons For More Pain,
Lies, Confusions, Character Assassination, Violations, Un-Invited
Alliances, Unwanted Attention, Heart-Breaks, Health Problems etc. in the
Future....
I had always been the one to Protect You So Long and Have Guide you in the Right Path,
I had always been the one to Protect You So Long and Have Guide you in the Right Path,
BUT
unfortunately due to your inability to understand very deep core values
and your unfortunate attachment/affinity and priority to Materialistic
Pleasures of Life no matter how unnecessary they may be OVER Morals
& Ethics of True Love and Soulmateship is what has Made you hate
me....
SAD BUT ITS TRUE - THIS EVIL WORLD HAS MORE CONTROL OVER YOU THAN ME....
SAD BUT ITS TRUE - THIS EVIL WORLD HAS MORE CONTROL OVER YOU THAN ME....
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